Arguments and conflicts are inevitable aspects of human interactions, but the Bible provides guidance on handling disagreements with wisdom, humility, and love. In this compilation, we explore 30 Bible verses on arguing, each accompanied by an expanded word commentary that delves into the biblical context and provides insights on resolving conflicts in a manner that aligns with God’s principles.
Bible Verses On Arguing
Proverbs 15:1 (NKJV):
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
This proverb highlights the power of gentle and wise words in diffusing anger and preventing further escalation of conflicts.
Commentary: Proverbs 15:1 underscores the importance of choosing our words wisely in the midst of disagreements. A soft and gentle response has the potential to de-escalate tension and redirect the course of a conversation. This verse challenges believers to exercise self-control over their speech, recognizing that harsh words can fuel anger and hinder the resolution of conflicts. In the context of arguing, the verse encourages a measured and considerate approach that seeks peace over strife.
Proverbs 17:14 (NKJV):
“The beginning of strife is like releasing water; therefore, stop contention before a quarrel starts.”
This proverb uses the imagery of a dam breaking to illustrate the rapid escalation of strife and emphasizes the importance of nipping conflicts in the bud.
Commentary: Proverbs 17:14 employs a vivid metaphor to convey the rapid and uncontrollable spread of strife once it begins. The imagery of releasing water signifies the potential for conflicts to intensify quickly. The verse calls for proactive measures to prevent the escalation of contention, urging individuals to address and resolve issues before they develop into full-fledged quarrels. In the context of arguing, this verse emphasizes the significance of timely intervention and conflict resolution to maintain peace and unity.
Proverbs 18:2 (NKJV):
“A fool has no delight in understanding, but in expressing his own heart.”
This proverb contrasts the wise pursuit of understanding with the folly of prioritizing self-expression over listening and comprehension.
Commentary: Proverbs 18:2 draws a sharp contrast between wisdom and foolishness in the context of communication. The fool, as described in the verse, lacks delight in understanding and is more focused on expressing personal opinions and feelings. In the realm of arguing, this verse serves as a cautionary reminder to avoid the folly of disregarding understanding and actively cultivate a desire to comprehend the perspectives of others. It encourages believers to prioritize empathy and comprehension over a self-centered desire to assert one’s own views.
Proverbs 20:3 (NKJV):
“It is honorable for a man to stop striving, since any fool can start a quarrel.”
This proverb extols the virtue of seeking peace and honoring individuals who choose to cease contention, highlighting the ease with which conflicts can begin.
Commentary: Proverbs 20:3 underscores the honorable nature of choosing to end a dispute and seek peace. The verse contrasts the ease of starting a quarrel, something accessible to anyone, with the nobility of stopping the strife. In the context of arguing, this verse challenges believers to recognize the value of pursuing peace, even when faced with provocations or disagreements. It encourages the cultivation of a spirit that prioritizes harmony and seeks resolution over perpetuating conflict.
Matthew 5:9 (NKJV):
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.”
Jesus’ words in the Sermon on the Mount emphasize the blessedness of those who actively work towards peace, aligning them with the character of God.
Commentary: Matthew 5:9 presents a beatitude that extols the virtue of peacemaking. Jesus declares those who actively pursue peace as blessed and identifies them as sons of God. In the context of arguing, this verse encourages believers to adopt a proactive stance in fostering reconciliation and harmony. It aligns peacemaking with a divine characteristic, emphasizing the spiritual significance of contributing to the resolution of conflicts and promoting unity.
James 1:19-20 (NKJV):
“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
James provides practical advice on effective communication by urging believers to prioritize listening, exercise restraint in speech, and avoid the destructive consequences of unchecked anger.
Commentary: James 1:19-20 imparts practical wisdom on navigating conflicts through effective communication. The emphasis on being swift to hear and slow to speak underscores the importance of active listening and measured speech. Additionally, the warning against unchecked wrath highlights the potential harm that uncontrolled anger can cause. In the context of arguing, this passage encourages believers to cultivate patience, attentiveness, and emotional self-control, recognizing that such qualities contribute to the righteous outcomes desired by God.
Proverbs 29:11 (NKJV):
“A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.”
This proverb contrasts the impulsive expression of emotions with the wisdom of exercising restraint in communication.
Commentary: Proverbs 29:11 draws a distinction between the foolish and the wise in the realm of emotions and communication. The fool, as described in the verse, impulsively vents all feelings without restraint. In contrast, the wise person exercises self-control by holding back and carefully choosing when and how to express emotions. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to emulate the wisdom of measured communication, recognizing that unbridled emotional expression may hinder effective resolution of conflicts.
Proverbs 18:13 (NKJV):
“He who answers a matter before he hears it, it is folly and shame to him.”
This proverb admonishes against hasty judgment and underscores the importance of carefully listening before responding.
Commentary: Proverbs 18:13 cautions against the folly and shame of prematurely responding to a matter without taking the time to listen and fully understand. The verse highlights the negative consequences of hasty judgments and underscores the value of patience and attentiveness. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to resist the temptation to react impulsively and instead prioritize thorough understanding before formulating responses.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NKJV):
“Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.”
Paul addresses the reality of anger but urges believers to handle it in a way that prevents sin and avoids providing an opportunity for the devil.
Commentary: Ephesians 4:26-27 acknowledges the inevitability of anger but provides guidance on its constructive management. Believers are encouraged to express anger without sinning and to address conflicts promptly, preventing prolonged resentment. The warning against letting the sun go down on one’s wrath underscores the urgency of resolving conflicts to avoid providing an opportunity for the devil to sow discord. In the context of arguing, this passage advocates for the timely and righteous handling of anger in order to maintain healthy relationships and spiritual well-being.
Matthew 18:15 (NKJV):
“Moreover, if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.”
Jesus provides a step-by-step approach to resolving conflicts, emphasizing the importance of direct communication and seeking reconciliation.
Commentary: Matthew 18:15 outlines a process for conflict resolution within the community of believers. Jesus encourages individuals to address grievances directly with the offending party, emphasizing the goal of gaining back the brother or sister. This verse highlights the value of personal communication and the pursuit of reconciliation. In the context of arguing, it provides a practical model for believers to follow, fostering understanding and resolution through direct and private communication.
Proverbs 16:32 (NKJV):
“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.”
This proverb extols the virtue of exercising self-control over one’s emotions, particularly the powerful force of anger.
Commentary: Proverbs 16:32 exalts the individual who demonstrates self-control, particularly in managing anger. The comparison between one who is slow to anger and the mighty warrior who conquers a city underscores the formidable nature of emotional restraint. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to prioritize the development of inner strength and self-discipline, recognizing the positive impact of such qualities on personal relationships and conflict resolution.
Colossians 3:13 (NKJV):
“bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.”
Paul urges believers to practice forbearance, forgiveness, and compassion towards each other, modeling the forgiveness received from Christ.
Commentary: Colossians 3:13 emphasizes the importance of bearing with one another and extending forgiveness, echoing the merciful attitude demonstrated by Christ. The verse calls believers to emulate Christ’s forgiveness in their relationships with others. In the context of arguing, this passage advocates for a spirit of compassion and forgiveness, recognizing that the willingness to bear with and forgive others contributes to the restoration of relationships and the fostering of unity within the Christian community.
Proverbs 21:23 (NKJV):
“Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles.”
This proverb underscores the protective role of exercising control over one’s speech in preventing unnecessary troubles.
Commentary: Proverbs 21:23 highlights the proactive role of guarding one’s mouth and tongue in averting troubles. The verse emphasizes the connection between speech and the well-being of the soul. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to exercise careful control over their words, recognizing the potential for verbal expressions to escalate conflicts and create unnecessary difficulties. It underscores the importance of intentional and thoughtful communication.
Romans 14:19 (NKJV):
“Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.”
Paul urges believers to actively pursue peace and prioritize actions that contribute to the building up of others.
Commentary: Romans 14:19 encourages believers to be proactive in their pursuit of peace and edification. The verse calls for intentional efforts to engage in actions that foster harmony and contribute to the spiritual growth of fellow believers. In the context of arguing, this passage challenges individuals to assess their actions and prioritize those that promote peace and mutual edification. It aligns with the biblical principle of actively contributing to the well-being of the Christian community.
Proverbs 25:9 (NKJV):
“Debate your case with your neighbor, and do not disclose the secret to another.”
This proverb advises individuals to engage in open and direct communication with neighbors while cautioning against unnecessary disclosure of secrets.
Commentary: Proverbs 25:9 advocates for transparent communication and resolution of issues directly with neighbors. The verse recognizes the value of open debate or discussion to address concerns. Simultaneously, it advises discretion in not unnecessarily disclosing secrets to others. In the context of arguing, this proverb promotes a healthy and constructive approach to conflict resolution—addressing issues openly and directly with those involved, while also exercising wisdom in the sharing of confidential information.
Philippians 2:3-4 (NKJV):
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests but also for the interests of others.”
Paul encourages believers to approach interactions with humility, prioritizing the well-being and interests of others over selfish ambitions.
Commentary: Philippians 2:3-4 provides a foundational principle for healthy interpersonal relationships by emphasizing humility and consideration for others. The call to avoid selfish ambition and conceit aligns with the biblical ethic of esteeming others above oneself. In the context of arguing, these verses challenge believers to approach conflicts with a humble mindset, prioritizing the needs and interests of others. This attitude fosters an environment conducive to resolution and mutual understanding.
James 4:1-2 (NKJV):
“Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask.”
James explores the root causes of conflicts and emphasizes the importance of seeking God in fulfilling legitimate desires.
Commentary: James 4:1-2 addresses the source of conflicts by pointing to desires that lead to unfulfilled longings and destructive behaviors. The passage emphasizes the importance of seeking God for legitimate needs rather than resorting to harmful actions. In the context of arguing, this passage challenges believers to examine the motivations behind conflicts and encourages a reliance on prayer and seeking God’s guidance for the resolution of needs and desires.
Proverbs 14:29 (NKJV):
“He who is slow to wrath has great understanding, but he who is impulsive exalts folly.”
This proverb connects the ability to control anger with a demonstration of great understanding and contrasts it with the folly of impulsive behavior.
Commentary: Proverbs 14:29 establishes a link between emotional control, particularly in managing anger, and possessing great understanding. The contrast with impulsive behavior highlights the negative consequences of unbridled emotional reactions. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to cultivate patience and emotional restraint, recognizing the wisdom inherent in controlling one’s responses during conflicts. It underscores the correlation between measured reactions and a demonstration of profound understanding.
Proverbs 15:18 (NKJV):
“A wrathful man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger allays contention.”
This proverb contrasts the disruptive influence of an angry person with the calming effect of one who exercises patience in the face of contention.
Commentary: Proverbs 15:18 emphasizes the contrasting impact of wrath and patience in the context of conflicts. The wrathful individual is depicted as stirring up strife, while the one who is slow to anger is described as alleviating contention. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to consider the impact of their emotional responses on the dynamics of conflicts. It underscores the potential for patient and measured reactions to contribute to the resolution of contention.
Proverbs 17:1 (NKJV):
“Better is a dry morsel with quietness, than a house full of feasting with strife.”
This proverb prioritizes peace and tranquility over material abundance, highlighting the detrimental effects of a contentious household.
Commentary: Proverbs 17:1 draws a stark contrast between the value of peace and quietness and the abundance of material possessions in the context of family life. The verse suggests that a humble and modest existence characterized by harmony is preferable to a wealthier but strife-filled household. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to prioritize relational harmony over the pursuit of worldly possessions, recognizing the profound impact of a peaceful home environment.
Proverbs 26:17 (NKJV):
“He who passes by and meddles in a quarrel not his own is like one who takes a dog by the ears.”
This proverb uses vivid imagery to caution against unnecessary interference in quarrels that do not involve the observer.
Commentary: Proverbs 26:17 employs a vivid metaphor to caution against meddling in quarrels that do not directly involve the observer. The image of taking a dog by the ears conveys the unpredictability and potential danger of involving oneself unnecessarily in the disputes of others. In the context of arguing, this proverb encourages believers to exercise discernment in choosing when and how to engage in conflicts, avoiding unnecessary interference that may lead to unintended consequences.
1 Corinthians 1:10 (NKJV):
“Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.”
Paul urges unity among believers, emphasizing the importance of shared perspectives and a harmonious mindset.
Commentary: 1 Corinthians 1:10 calls for unity among believers in the Corinthian church. Paul pleads for a shared understanding and a collective commitment to avoid divisions. In the context of arguing, this verse encourages believers to prioritize the common goals and shared beliefs that bind them together. It challenges individuals to seek harmony and consensus, fostering an environment where conflicts are approached with a shared mindset and a commitment to maintaining the unity of the body of Christ.
Proverbs 26:20 (NKJV):
“Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no talebearer, strife ceases.”
This proverb draws a parallel between fuel for a fire and gossip as contributors to the perpetuation of strife.
Commentary: Proverbs 26:20 uses the analogy of firewood and gossip to illustrate the perpetuation of strife. The absence of wood allows a fire to go out, and likewise, the absence of a talebearer contributes to the cessation of strife. In the context of arguing, this proverb underscores the destructive role of gossip and the importance of avoiding the spread of information that can fuel conflicts. It encourages believers to exercise discretion in their communication and to refrain from contributing to the escalation of disputes.
James 3:17-18 (NKJV):
“But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.”
James describes the characteristics of divine wisdom and its association with peaceful and fruitful outcomes.
Commentary: James 3:17-18 provides a comprehensive description of wisdom from above, emphasizing its purity, peaceable nature, gentleness, willingness to yield, and fullness of mercy and good fruits. The association between righteousness and the sowing of peace highlights the transformative impact of godly wisdom on relationships. In the context of arguing, these verses encourage believers to seek and apply divine wisdom in their interactions, fostering a spirit of peace, mercy, and righteousness that contributes to the resolution of conflicts.
1 Peter 3:8-9 (NKJV):
“Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing.”
Peter urges believers to cultivate unity, compassion, brotherly love, and a commitment to blessing others, even in the face of adversity.
Commentary: 1 Peter 3:8-9 provides a set of virtues for believers to embody in their relationships. Unity of mind, compassion, brotherly love, tenderheartedness, and courtesy are presented as essential qualities. The directive to avoid returning evil for evil emphasizes the transformative power of blessing others in the face of adversity. In the context of arguing, these verses challenge believers to cultivate a Christlike attitude that prioritizes unity, compassion, and the intentional blessing of others, contributing to the resolution of conflicts.
Proverbs 15:31-32 (NKJV):
“The ear that hears the rebukes of life will abide among the wise. He who disdains instruction despises his own soul, but he who heeds rebuke gets understanding.”
These proverbs emphasize the importance of receiving and heeding constructive criticism for personal growth and understanding.
Commentary: Proverbs 15:31-32 highlights the value of receptive ears to constructive criticism and rebuke. The connection between abiding among the wise and the ability to accept correction underscores the role of humility in personal growth. In the context of arguing, these proverbs encourage believers to be open to constructive feedback and correction, recognizing that a humble and teachable spirit contributes to understanding and wisdom.
Matthew 18:21-22 (NKJV):
“Then Peter came to Him and said, ‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.'”
Jesus responds to Peter’s question about forgiveness by emphasizing the limitless nature of forgiveness.
Commentary: Matthew 18:21-22 addresses the theme of forgiveness, with Peter inquiring about the frequency of forgiving a brother who sins. Jesus responds with the directive to extend forgiveness generously, using the symbolic expression of seventy times seven to convey limitless forgiveness. In the context of arguing, this passage challenges believers to adopt a posture of continual forgiveness, recognizing the transformative power of extending grace and mercy in the resolution of conflicts.
Ephesians 4:29 (NKJV):
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”
Paul instructs believers to use words that build up and impart grace, avoiding corrupt speech that hinders edification.
Commentary: Ephesians 4:29 provides guidance on speech, urging believers to avoid corrupt or harmful words and instead use language that is good for necessary edification. The emphasis on imparting grace to the hearers underscores the positive impact of words that contribute to the spiritual growth and well-being of others. In the context of arguing, this verse encourages believers to exercise discernment in their speech, choosing words that promote understanding, reconciliation, and the building up of those involved in conflicts.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NKJV):
“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
Paul’s famous description of love in 1 Corinthians 13 outlines the selfless and enduring qualities that contribute to the resolution of conflicts.
Commentary: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 provides a comprehensive description of the characteristics of love. The virtues of patience, kindness, humility, selflessness, and endurance are presented as integral to the nature of love. In the context of arguing, these verses challenge believers to approach conflicts with a mindset of love, prioritizing the well-being of others over personal grievances. Love, as described here, becomes a guiding principle for resolving conflicts in a manner that aligns with God’s redemptive and reconciling purposes.
Romans 12:18 (NKJV):
“If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”
Paul encourages believers to actively pursue peace and live harmoniously with others to the extent possible.
Commentary: Romans 12:18 sets forth a practical and proactive directive to believers regarding their relationships with others. The emphasis on living peaceably and the acknowledgment of the limits of individual control convey the importance of personal effort in fostering harmonious relationships. In the context of arguing, this verse challenges believers to actively seek peace and contribute to the resolution of conflicts in their interactions with others. It recognizes that, while complete control over external circumstances may not be possible, believers can still make intentional efforts to live peaceably.
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